


I'm not your mum?

by pxnkman



Category: Hat Films - Fandom, The Yogscast
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-25
Updated: 2016-11-25
Packaged: 2018-09-02 04:59:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,237
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8651896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pxnkman/pseuds/pxnkman
Summary: Based on “I turned up at your doorstep drunk af proclaiming you were my mum and because you were so confused and bewildered you let me crash on your sofa until i woke up confused as hell the next morning and ran out your house but then came back to apologise later” au by my friend Eddie!





	

Chris was just getting ready for bed when he heard a loud, startling banging on his door making him jump out of his skin. He looked over to the clock, 10:34. Just fucking great.

“Who the fuck wants me at this hour?” he grumbled, proceeding downstairs preparing himself for the worst. None of his friends or family ever called at this time of night.

 

Firstly, he made sure to put the chain of his door up just to be sure that anyone unwanted wouldn’t be able to easily force their way in. Cautiously, he then pulled the front door open as much as the chain would allow, slowly revealing a tall red headed man leaning against the door frame. Chris was confused, very confused, and before he even had time to say anything the other man began to speak.

 

“Hey Mum,“ the man dragged out, "I forgot my keys, thanks for letting me in!” His voice was slurred giving away the fact he was drunk, no more than drunk, utterly wasted. Without second thought Chris shut the door, leaning back on the now shut door, believing it was some kind of joke that someone was playing on him. Minutes passed and the other was still there blubbering about his day and it was clear to Chris that he was genuinely confused and lost. He thought about what to do, leaving him out this late was dangerous, he could get mugged, stumble into a busy street just to be hit by a car, or something even worse.

 

The drunken man didn’t seem violent. He wasn’t shouting or demanding the door to be opened, so surely it was Chris’ responsibility to help him. Considering the fact he believed Chris was his Mother. Sighing, he then turned back around to unhook the chain and open the door for a second time only to be greeted with the other man toppling into him. Great. Just what I needed. 

 

When Chris planned for a nice, and relaxed night earlier in the day he did not mean to be smothered by a blubbering, alcohol filled lump of a man at god knows what hour. He also certainly did not expect for said lump to be half snoring, half mumbling nuisance into his jumper that was quickly being covered in drunken spit. Good thing I don’t really like this particular jumper then.

 

“Alright, uh-” Chris let out a loud ‘oof’ as the mumbling man stumbled and elbowed him in the stomach, making a final decision that his subconscious was surely protesting against, “let’s just get you to my couch shall we?”

 

With some trial and error, a lot of error, Chris managed to get the man’s arm around him to balance with and then began to slowly shuffle with the man to his living room. It seemed a somewhat easy task in Chris’ head but the moment the drunken man lolled his head to the side and smacked it right on the doorframe of his livingroom, Chris lost his grip on the man as he jumped, flailing his arms wildly as his drunken mind tried to figure just what part of his body was hurt. Chris would’ve felt bad for him if he wasn’t slightly beginning to piss him off.

 

“My head” the man whined out, “wha’d I do?”

 

Chris chose to ignore the man’s constant comments and confused, slurred speeches and finally got the man to his couch. Letting himself catch his breath. They really should add ‘carry-a-drunken-man-through-your-house’ to the Olympics, it is quite the workout.

 

With one final exhale, Chris clicked his fingers a few times to get the man’s attention once more before he fell asleep in a heap of a mess, strewn across Chris’ couch.

 

“I’m going to let you sleep on my couch and-”

 

Chris was interrupted by the drunken man opening his eyes to a half lid and putting on the most stupid, drunken grin Chris had ever seen and then almost bellowed out “Yay!” while throwing his hands half-assed up in the air to then smack himself in the face when he let his arms fall again, resulting in the 'yay’ to turn into an 'ow’. At least it shut him up.

 

Deciding to start again Chris inhaled again, half in annoyance and half in exhaustion, “I’m going to let you crash on my couch-” He quickly hushed the man as he began to put that stupid smile back on his face, Chris could not hear that drawn out sound of happiness again without throwing the man out of his house, quite literally. “And you must be out by the morning. Understand?”

 

Faking a serious look on his face, the drunken man stuck out his bottom lip and stiffened up, bringing his hand to his head in a mock 'salute’.

 

“Yes'sir!” the man shouted out and then began to drunkenly giggle to himself. Chris silently wished to himself that he’d never have to hear from the man ever again by morning. All he wanted to do now was go up to his own bed and crash as soon as he hit his own pillow.

 

Heading back upstairs, Chris tried to process what had just happened, a drunken stranger had turned up at his door step confusing him to be his mother and said drunken stranger was now crashed out on his couch. Chris still didn’t even know the name of the red headed man. What a bad mother I am, he thought to himself sarcastically. Beginning to laugh to himself after realising how ridiculous this all was, how utterly dream (or nightmare) worthy the situation was, it would definitely be a story to tell your grandchildren. 

Chris certainly wasn’t fully angry his planned quiet night was ruined, in fact, in a strange way he was rather glad to have something brighten his week up. Brushing off just how strange said thing was. He stopped at his bedroom door to ponder to himself, Honestly, I would’ve thrown that lump out a while ago if his drunken stupor wasn’t so oddly cute. In a weird way. Laughing quietly at the sudden thought, he headed into his bedroom to finally get some rest. 

 

Flopping down on his bed, Chris stared at the extra blankets and pillows laying around his room, suddenly feeling a pang of guilt for leaving the stranger with nothing to protect himself from the cold. His alcohol filled body probably wouldn’t register such cold but the thought didn’t stop Chris from feeling any less guilty. Finally making a decision, Chris groaned and stood up once again, he gave into his guilt and picked up a blanket followed by two pillows. He then began to head downstairs once more to see his ‘guest’

 

Entering the living room, he opened his mouth to declare his presence before noticing the other man was fast asleep, mouth open and dribbling all over his sofa.

 

“Wonderful” Chris mumbled to himself while lifting the taller man’s head, placing a pillow underneath and covering him in a blanket the best he could while the man drunkenly moved in his sleep.

 

“Mmm, thanks mum” the drunken man slurred before he snuggled into the blanket and began to snore like a doof.

 

“No problem” Chris rolled his eyes to himself and breathed out a light laugh while exiting the room to head back upstairs to his bed for some well-deserved rest. What a fucking night.


End file.
